Has anyone else suddenly sound themselves surrounded by constant perimenopause chat?!
Or is it just me?
Genuinely, I’d love to know.
Lately it feels like everywhere I turn, someone is talking about perimenopause. Social media is full of it. Podcasts are full of it. Friends are talking about it. My sister and I have even found ourselves having conversations we’ve never really had before.
Part of me wonders whether my algorithm has simply figured me out. I’ve searched for a couple of things and now it’s decided that perimenopause is basically my entire personality.
But even when I deliberately step away from social media, the conversations keep appearing.
Women are talking.
And many of them seem to be struggling.
Which has left me wondering…
Has this always been happening and women just didn't feel able to talk about it?
Or are more women genuinely experiencing symptoms earlier and more intensely than previous generations?
I’m really curious about this…
Puberty in reverse
What I do know is that this experience has completely knocked me off my feet! At 43, I genuinely thought I had another decade before I needed to think about menopause. Instead, I’ve found myself navigating brain fog, exhaustion, fluctuating moods, and a strange feeling that my life no longer feels like my own.
That’s probably been the hardest part. The feeling of becoming disconnected from yourself. The things that would normally light me up don’t seem to have the same spark. I’m struggling to access the energy, enthusiasm and clarity that I once took for granted. It feels as though my brain has gone offline. No matter what I’ve tried to do to reboot it, I often find myself wandering around in a haze of fogginess, wondering where “me” went.
But perhaps the most unexpected thing has been the return of old feelings. Feelings I haven’t experienced since I was a teenager.
Uncertainty.
Self-doubt.
Wanting to withdraw.
Feeling frustrated with myself.
That familiar experience of knowing what I want to do but not being able to get my brain to cooperate.
There have been moments when I’ve almost been transported back to being sixteen years old, studying for my GCSEs, feeling overwhelmed, anxious and deeply uncomfortable in my own skin. Then recently I heard someone describe perimenopause as “puberty in reverse.” And suddenly everything made sense. Because that’s exactly what it feels like. Not just the physical symptoms, but the emotional ones too. The awkwardness. The insecurity. The feeling that your body is changing the rules without consulting you. The loss of control. The sudden anxiety of not knowing what your body is doing and (I guess as we identify as our body), it leads us to not know who you are anymore.
What I do know is that this experience has completely knocked me off my feet! At 43, I genuinely thought I had another decade before I needed to think about menopause. Instead, I’ve found myself navigating brain fog, exhaustion, fluctuating moods, and a strange feeling that my life no longer feels like my own.
That’s probably been the hardest part. The feeling of becoming disconnected from yourself. The things that would normally light me up don’t seem to have the same spark. I’m struggling to access the energy, enthusiasm and clarity that I once took for granted. It feels as though my brain has gone offline. No matter what I’ve tried to do to reboot it, I often find myself wandering around in a haze of fogginess, wondering where “me” went.
Apparently perimenopause can last for up to ten years before menopause itself. Yet many women – and often many healthcare professionals, don’t realise this.
Which means there are countless women in their late thirties and forties experiencing significant shifts without understanding why. Or realising it could be this. Many, wrongly being put on antidepressants sadly. And honestly I’m still shocked by how little we talk about it.
Women’s health has come so far, yet sometimes it feels as though we’re still piecing together information that should have been common knowledge decades ago. Well actually – we’ve been around just as long as men lol, why are they looking at us (when we’re sat in the GP chair with this going on) like we’ve just landed from another planet!! That’s what I really can’t get my head around. How have women been so ignored for so long?!
Open up the conversation
I’m still very much in the middle of this journey myself.
But I wanted to open up the conversation.
Are you noticing changes?
Have you experienced symptoms that surprised you?
Do you sometimes feel like you’re meeting a completely new version of yourself?
And if you’re navigating any of this, would you be interested in gathering with other women for cacao circles and conversations around perimenopause, wellbeing and this ‘journey’ we’re moving through together?
I’d love to hear your experiences.
Because one thing I’m realising is that perhaps the most powerful thing we can do is stop going through it alone.
Final Note
Please be gentle with yourself while reflecting on any of this 🤍
Let there be no self-judgement. Only curiosity, awareness and compassion.
Sometimes just noticing the pressure we’re carrying is the first step toward finally releasing it.
Sending love,
Lisa x